Dating and Self Esteem

Hello friends,
How's your Love Life? Today we are going to talk about dating and relationships and how they reflect your self esteem plus the trap of "settling".

 Recently I was watching SNL and they preformed a comedy satire of a new dating app. It spoofed all the online dating sites/apps and featured women who were "settling" because they were ready to get married. It was funny, but then again, it wasn't. I have seen too many people, both male and female fall into the trap of settling and the unhappiness it brings.

What about you? Are you dating the people you want to be dating or are you settling for a "meh" relationship because you secretly don't believe you are worthy? Are you settling?

It's actually an easy trap to fall into.

How you see yourself is directly related to how the world will treat you, or more correctly what you will accept from others. 

So how do you know if you are settling?
Here are a few signals that you may be settling for less than you deserve:
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• You don't feel your partner is listening to you.
• You are accepting  less than you need.
• Do you secretly fell unsatisfied with your relationship, but keep it going?
• Are you afraid you have "missed the boat"?
• You have been cheated on repeatedly and keep giving them chances.
• You've been told you were too emotional.
• Did you make significant changes for your partner?
• Are you paying for everything?
• Does your partner demean you?
• Your relationship leaves you feeling anxious, depressed and confused.
• Does your partner require you to give up contact with your friends and family?
• Does it feel like you are the only one trying?
• Your partner is never there when you need them.
• You don't feel emotionally supported 100% of the time.

Bonus: 
Ask yourself this question:
Are you happy with who you are right now? 

A healthy relationship feeds your soul, mind and body. You help each other, work as a team and are friends. Deeper levels of intimacy open up and you collectedly grow. Both of you should learn, grow and flourish. It is not supposed to be one sided or always a dramatic struggle. While its normal for problems to crop up, they should not be manufactured by your partner or his behavior.

If you are in an abusive relationship there is no magic answer other than leaving. And you MUST leave, I can tell you it will only get worse. No one deserves to be in an abusive relationship. YOU don't deserve it. 

Self love begins when you realize that you deserve better. There is no logical reason in the world to settle for less. With healthy self esteem and a good self love program its easier to avoid the trap of settling. 

Work on raising your self love because how you feel about yourself, is what you will allow in a relationship. 

Sarah